Countless He Zongjian, What a Night in Zhangjiang
I once saw a themed ad that Yao Ming GG shot for Shanghai, where Yao Ming played multiple roles — company boss, golfer, bus driver… many characters — with the tagline “Countless Yao Mings, what a Shanghai.” Using this to promote how great Shanghai is. Shanghai has my dreams and so on.
But the real Yao Ming GG probably doesn’t have that kind of潇洒. Born so tall, destined to play basketball. And these past two years in the NBA, taking the American imperialists’ money — having taken, you’re beholden. Even when tired of playing, you have to play; tired of fadeaway jump shots and hook shots, you still have to shoot. Once famous, it’s hard to get off the tiger.
The title of this blog isn’t to compare myself to Yao Ming — I’m not as tall, handsome, or rich as him. Except that Yao Ming and I share the same birth date (different year), I have nothing in common with him.
I’m someone who likes constant change and motion. Staying in one place too long without change feels terrible. The Chinese saying goes: “When poor, change; change brings流通;流通 brings endurance.” I want to change whether I’m poor or not. A一成不变 life is the most terrifying thing for me. You might say that jumping around means you won’t accumulate anything or improve — “jack of all trades, master of none.” Maybe. Who knows? What’s so great about being a specialist anyway? For the individual, as long as you live happily and can use your skills to earn a living, isn’t that enough? In the end, everyone ends up in the crematorium — it’s all the same. Oh, not quite the same — for Yao Ming GG, the cremation furnace might be too small, and they’d have to cut his body in half and cremate him twice… (I wonder if Yao Ming’s fans will hire gangsters to deal with me after reading this). So, life is only a few decades. Use these decades to experience multiple ways of living, experience multiple lifestyles. When you enter the crematorium, you can think about all the different things you’ve done, all the different social classes, roles, and people you’ve experienced — it’s like living several lives. You’ve come out ahead. In that sense, Bill Gates’ life isn’t that great either — 12 consecutive years without any change, just doing one thing: being the world’s richest person. (Chinese spiritual victory is truly无敌.)
So, although this year is only my second zodiac year, counting on my fingers, I’ve already played many roles. Starting from 2000: I’ve been an accounting student, studying economics, management, financial accounting, cost accounting; I’ve been a software school student, studying operating systems, data structures; I’ve been a telecom school grad student, studying Petri nets; I’ve been a Microsoft technical support person, solving problems over the phone with MS’s big clients; I’ve been a small boss programmer, meeting customers and outsourcing work; I’ve been a programmer at a domestic top-tier system software company, modifying OS code; I’ve been a university lecturer, teaching undergrads and grad students; I’ve been a researcher, securing tens of thousands in research funding; I’ve been a technical expert, speaking on the same stage as the father of C++; I’ve been a writer, writing books and publishing articles; I’ve been a technical consultant, enjoying four-figure daily rates; I’ve even been a migrant worker, carrying eggs for a supermarket at one yuan per box…
Looking back, I feel I’m essentially still a programmer — just not always fighting on the front line of coding in front of a computer. They say programmers are more adept at communicating with computers than with people. I don’t believe that. So, when I’m hungry and bored from eating too little (currently making 250 yuan a month, definitely not overeating), I go to Zhangjiang Town where I live to do some social investigation. Not deliberately — one night while buying lamb skewers I无意 chatted with someone, and it snowballed into the following article.
—- I’m the gorgeous dividing line —-
My name is He Zongjian, female, 22 years old. I sell barbecue skewers on Zhangjiang Town — lamb, beef, eggplant, cucumber, chicken legs, chicken wings. I push a small cart out at night to sell.
In this business, we’re most afraid of the城管 (city management). If they catch us, they’ll make our lives miserable. Fortunately, my work hours don’t overlap with theirs. The城管 are横行霸道 on the streets during the day and go home at night. My work basically starts in the evening and goes until 2 AM.
They say there’s a high-tech park near Zhangjiang Town. I’m not sure what park — probably a zoo, because I hear there’s a group of “orange-bearded apes” locked up inside. They leave in the morning and return at night. Basically, starting around 8 PM, these orange-bearded apes gradually come back to Zhangjiang Town. They buy some of my skewers. I can tell these apes have some money — I hear some of the ape leaders make five figures a month.
Every day after work, I go home and crash. By the time I get home and sleep, it’s already 3 or 4 AM. I usually sleep until 11 AM, then get up to buy meat and ingredients, thread the skewers — takes about an afternoon. After dinner, I push the cart, with charcoal and freshly threaded skewers, and start work again.
You ask about my income? Sigh, about the same as working for someone else. What? You don’t know what打工 pays? Just go look at the job listings at the entrance of the Zhangjiang employment agency:
- Jialefu Supermarket promoter: 800/month + commission
- XX Company security guard: 1200/month + room and board
- XX Factory assembly line worker: 900/month + single day off
- XX Department senior marketing staff (female only): 30000/month + bonus + sent to UK to study after two years…
Me, running my own business — my income is about the same as theirs. (Who wrote that last one? Doesn’t count!) Every day, I can make about 200 yuan in revenue. In accounting, that’s gross profit. After deducting material and labor costs, the net profit is about 60 yuan a day. Working about 20-something days a month, that’s a bit over a thousand.
A few years ago, barbecue business was decent. Now there are too many people doing it on the town, competition is fierce, and business isn’t as good.
—- I’m the gorgeous dividing line —-
My name is He Zongjian, 30 years old. I sell books on Zhangjiang Town. If I were selling legal books, I’d be under the Ministry of Culture. But I push a cart to the entrance of the Nonggongshang Supermarket — everyone in Zhangjiang knows it — only after dark to sell books.
In this business, we’re most afraid of the城管. If they catch us… Fortunately my work hours don’t overlap with theirs. I work from evening until 2 AM. They say there’s a high-tech park nearby — probably a zoo, because I hear there are “orange-bearded apes” locked up inside. They come back to town around 8 PM and buy some of my books. I can tell some of these apes are quite cultured — I hear some are even “tobacco, alcohol, and monk” types. (Reader: The author is confusing — isn’t this just copy-paste?)
I came from Gansu, my hometown. I’ve been in this business for 8 years. My only hobby is reading books. I work nights, but during the day I’m not idle either — I read in my little rundown room. Literature, history, philosophy, geography — I read them all. I’m not educated, so I can’t read English books. But as long as it’s Chinese characters, I’ll read it.
I also collect and read literary classics. I’ve collected over a thousand books now — not as scrap paper, I’ve actually read them all. They come from two sources: ones I picked up at the used book market, and ones I couldn’t sell. A few days ago, a self-proclaimed Tongji University computer grad student came to buy books and claimed to know a lot about history. I casually mentioned Loulan and the Inca Empire, and he was stunned. What are these grad students good for besides bragging?
What? You ask about my income? In this book-selling business, besides fearing the城管, I also fear rainy days. When it rains, customers don’t come out, and my precious books might get wet. So I only make about 800-900 yuan a month — not as good as the food sellers (referring to the lamb skewer vendors). But what counts as “enough”? Being able to support myself, entertain myself, and live happily — that’s fine.
—- I’m the gorgeous dividing line —-
My name is He Zongjian, almost 30. I sell DVDs on Zhangjiang Town. If I were selling legal DVDs, I’d be contributing to socialist spiritual civilization. But I carry a small box to the pedestrian street entrance — everyone in Zhangjiang knows it — only after dark to sell DVDs.
In this business, we’re most afraid of the城管. Fortunately my work hours don’t overlap… I work from evening until 2 AM. They say there’s a zoo nearby with “orange-bearded apes” who come back around 8 PM and buy some of my DVDs. Some of these apes have culture — some even like to watch eagle-language (English) discs. (Reader: The author is hopeless — he’s been copy-pasting this whole time!!!)
I’m not like those book or lamb skewer sellers who hang from one tree. I have multiple jobs. During the day, I’m a FedEx employee (a foreign company white-collar worker). I wake up at 4 AM and run all over Pudong delivering packages all morning. Then I sleep in the afternoon. After sleeping, I go out at night to sell DVDs. Two jobs, so naturally my income is different. I earn as much as three lamb skewer vendors — over 2000 yuan a month. I can save about 20,000 a year. After three years, saving 60,000 yuan, I can go home and get married.
[To be continued?]
There are still several notable characters in Night Zhangjiang that I haven’t mentioned. I’m considering whether to continue the investigation… Can anyone donate some research funding… Will the richest guy in Zhangjiang (whose headquarters is also in Zhangjiang) see this post and give me a little something? Haha.